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March 1, 2024

Am I Controlling Quiz

Kristie Plantinga
,
MA
woman sits at a desk writing in a journaling holding her head to her forehead; am I controlling quiz
Guides
March 1, 2024
2 min to read
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It can be difficult to assess whether your own behaviors are overly controlling towards others. You may genuinely feel you have good intentions or are just looking out for loved ones. 

But if others have accused you of being too controlling, it's worthwhile to thoughtfully examine your actions. This quick quiz can help you determine if you exhibit unhealthy controlling tendencies in your relationships.

Please remember that exhibiting controlling behaviors does not make you a bad person. Very often, the roots of control issues come from childhood experiences or emotional insecurity. That being said, controlling tendencies can negatively affect relationships, so it's important to take ownership of your behavior and learn how to let go.

There are compassionate professionals who understand and can help you build more open, trusting relationships. The first step is acknowledging if there is a problem, but be kind to yourself through this process. 

How accurate is this quiz?

At Best Therapists, we believe that online mental health quizzes can be an excellent first step towards improving our mental health. Quizzes like this one can educate you and provide opportunities for self-reflection, but note that they are not a substitute for professional assessments and diagnoses.

Take our quiz below ↓

Your privacy is important to us, so all results are completely anonymous and no email is required.

Need more answers?

Frequently asked questions

What are some common signs of controlling behavior?

According to Mindbodygreen (1), some common signs of controlling behavior from another person are:

  • They criticize you constantly and make you feel inadequate
  • They isolate you from your friends and family
  • They monitor your phone, email, social media, or whereabouts
  • They make all the decisions for you and disregard your opinions
  • They threaten to harm you, themselves, or others if you don’t do what they want
  • They use guilt, manipulation, or emotional blackmail to get their way
  • They make you feel responsible for their happiness or problems
  • They make you doubt your own reality or perception
What can cause someone to be controlling?

According to Forbes (2), some common causes of controlling behavior are:

  • Lack of unconditional love from caregivers
  • Lack of adequate nurture from caregivers
  • Household abuse and neglect
  • Households with mental health and substance abuse issues
  • Insecurity, low self-esteem, or fear of abandonment
  • Disorders such as obsessive-compulsive disorder, personality disorders, or anxiety disorders
  • Chronic illness or disability that affects quality of life
  • Stressful life situations such as divorce, loss, or conflict
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Written by
Kristie Plantinga
,
MA

Kristie Plantinga is the founder of Best Therapists. Along with being on the client-side of therapy, Kristie has had the honor of working directly with therapists in her marketing agency for therapists, TherapieSEO. While working alongside therapists, she learned about the inequities in our mental health system that therapists face on a daily basis, and she wanted to do something about it. That’s why Best Therapists is a platform designed to benefit not only therapy-seekers, but therapy providers. Kristie has a Masters degree in Written Communication and a Bachelors degree in Psychology and Music.

Reviewed by
Katelyn McMahon
,
Registered Psychotherapist, VT #097.0134200

Katelyn is a therapist-turned-writer with a passion for mental health. She has a Master's degree in Social Work from the University of England and is a Registered Psychotherapist in the state of Vermont. Katelyn has professional experience in aging care, addiction treatment, integrated health care, and private practice settings. She also has lived experience being on the client side of therapy. Currently, Katelyn is a content writer who’s passionate about spreading mental health awareness and helping other therapists and therapy-seekers Do The Work.

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Show sources and research articles
  1. Collingwood, L. (2022, August 30). 11 sneaky signs you have a controlling partner + what to do about it. mindbodygreen. https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/signs-of-controlling-person
  2. Snow, R. (2022, September 20). What are control issues? Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/health/mind/what-are-control-issues/