+

Finding a therapist is exhausting.

That's why we vet therapists for you.

Find a vetted therapist
September 18, 2024

Borderline Mother Test

Kristie Plantinga
,
MA
borderline mother test
Guides
September 18, 2024
2 min to read
Show table of contents

Growing up with a mother who has intense emotional swings, unpredictable behaviors, or trouble maintaining stable relationships can be confusing and painful to say the least.

If you've often felt like you were walking on eggshells at home, unsure of how to navigate your mom's moods, or struggling to understand her actions, you're not alone. These can be signs that your mother may have borderline personality disorder (BPD), and many people have similar experiences.

In this post, our goal is to help you explore and understand these complex family dynamics. Our quiz can act as a tool to help you reflect on your experiences and see if they align with the typical patterns of a borderline mother.

Regardless of the quiz results, know that your feelings are valid. We'll offer resources for professional support that can be useful regardless of whether you may have a  mother with BPD.

How accurate is this quiz?

At Best Therapists, we believe that online mental health quizzes can be an excellent first step towards improving our mental health. Quizzes like this one can educate you and provide opportunities for self-reflection, but note that they are not a substitute for professional assessments and diagnoses.

Take our quiz below ↓

Your privacy is important to us, so all results are completely anonymous and no email is required.

Example situations with a borderline mother

  • Sarah calls her mother to share news about a job promotion. Initially, her mother is ecstatic, showering Sarah with praise. However, when Sarah mentions she'll need to work longer hours, her mother's mood suddenly shifts. She accuses Sarah of abandoning her and claims Sarah's success is making her feel like a failure. The conversation ends with her mother threatening to cut off contact, leaving Sarah feeling confused and guilty about her achievement.
  • Mike is having dinner with his mother. The meal starts pleasantly, but when Mike disagrees with her opinion on a minor issue, his mother becomes intensely angry. She brings up mistakes from Mike's past, calls him ungrateful, and storms out of the restaurant. An hour later, she calls Mike in tears, apologizing profusely and begging him not to leave her. Mike feels emotionally drained and unsure how to respond.
  • Emma is planning her wedding and asks her mother for help. At first, her mother is overjoyed and takes control of every detail. However, when Emma gently suggests a different flower arrangement, her mother becomes deeply offended. She accuses Emma of not appreciating her efforts and switches between crying that she's a terrible mother and angrily claiming Emma is ruining the wedding. Emma finds herself walking on eggshells, trying to manage her mother's emotions instead of enjoying her engagement.

Disclaimer: These examples are fictional scenarios created for illustrative and informational purposes only. They do not represent real individuals but are designed to depict typical experiences of people with mothers who may have Borderline Personality Disorder. These examples should not be used for self-diagnosis. If you have concerns about your own experiences, please consult with a qualified mental health professional.

Need more answers?

Frequently asked questions

Start Getting help from a vetted therapist

Vetted therapists in your area

Written by
Kristie Plantinga
,
MA

Kristie Plantinga is the founder of Best Therapists. Along with being on the client-side of therapy, Kristie has had the honor of working directly with therapists in her marketing agency for therapists, TherapieSEO. While working alongside therapists, she learned about the inequities in our mental health system that therapists face on a daily basis, and she wanted to do something about it. That’s why Best Therapists is a platform designed to benefit not only therapy-seekers, but therapy providers. Kristie has a Masters degree in Written Communication and a Bachelors degree in Psychology and Music.

Reviewed by
Katelyn McMahon
,
Registered Psychotherapist, VT #097.0134200

Katelyn is a therapist-turned-writer with a passion for mental health. She has a Master's degree in Social Work from the University of England and is a Registered Psychotherapist in the state of Vermont. Katelyn has professional experience in aging care, addiction treatment, integrated health care, and private practice settings. She also has lived experience being on the client side of therapy. Currently, Katelyn is a content writer who’s passionate about spreading mental health awareness and helping other therapists and therapy-seekers Do The Work.

Ready to start therapy?

Find a Best Therapists vetted therapist.

Find a therapist
Show sources and research articles