20 Examples of Narcissistic Behavior in Different Settings & Relationships

Have you ever felt like someone you know is constantly seeking attention, never takes responsibility for their actions, and seems obsessed with themselves? 

These behaviors could be signs of narcissism. Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a complex condition, but many people exhibit narcissistic tendencies in their everyday lives. 

This article will explore real-world examples of narcissistic behavior you might encounter in relationships, friendships, the workplace, and even your family. 

By understanding these behaviors, you'll be better equipped to navigate them and protect your own well-being.

Note that identifying with these examples is not a substitute for a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) from a mental health professional. Like we said, many people exhibit narcissistic behaviors but do not live with NPD.

Common Examples of Narcissistic Behavior

Let's delve into some real-world ways that narcissism can manifest in different types of relationships. Here are some common examples you might recognize.

Romantic Relationships

• The Admiration Vacuum: They crave constant compliments and adoration. Conversations often revolve around them, their achievements, or their desires.
  • Scenario: You're out for dinner with your partner and you mention getting a promotion. Instead of celebrating with you, they immediately launch into a story about a time they got a similar promotion (embellished of course) and how it was a much bigger deal. The rest of the evening is spent recounting their past accomplishments.
• Always Right, Never Wrong: Admitting mistakes is a foreign concept. They deflect blame, twist situations, and make their partner feel like they're overreacting.
  • Scenario: You accidentally break a favorite vase while doing chores. Your partner explodes, accusing you of being careless and inconsiderate. They refuse to acknowledge that they left the vase in a precarious spot earlier that day.
• The Monologue Master: Conversations become one-sided performances. They dominate the discussion, rarely showing genuine interest in their partner's thoughts or feelings.
  • Scenario: You excitedly tell your partner about a new project you're working on at work. They barely listen, interrupting with their own unrelated story before you can finish explaining yours. The conversation continues to revolve around their day and their plans for the weekend.
• Dimming Your Shine: Your accomplishments are downplayed or dismissed. They may subtly compete with you or try to steal the spotlight.
  • Scenario: You land your dream job and you're ecstatic to share the news with your partner. They nonchalantly respond, "That's nice, honey. But it probably won't be as stressful as my job." They then proceed to complain about their own workload, making your achievement seem insignificant.
• The Green-Eyed Monster on Steroids: Normal jealousy is amplified. They may constantly monitor your whereabouts, accuse you of infidelity, or try to isolate you from friends and family.
  • Scenario: You go out with a group of friends from work after a long week. Your partner constantly texts you throughout the night, demanding to know who you're with and when you'll be home. They accuse you of flirting with your co-worker and make passive-aggressive comments about your friendships.

Friendships

• The One-Man Show: Conversations become their personal stage. They dominate discussions, often talking about themselves, their achievements, or their problems.
  • Scenario: You meet up with a friend for lunch, eager to catch up. However, the entire conversation revolves around their recent vacation, their new car purchase, and their upcoming work promotion. They barely ask you a single question about your life.
• Friendship on Mute: They struggle to understand your emotions. When you're facing a difficult situation, they offer generic advice or quickly turn the conversation back to themselves.
  • Scenario: You're going through a tough breakup and need emotional support. You reach out to your friend, but they seem dismissive. They offer a quick, uncaring platitude like "you'll find someone else" and then launch into a story about their own recent dating disaster.
• The Favor Fairy (with strings attached): They readily ask for help and favors, but rarely reciprocate. They may guilt you or make you feel obligated to help them with their needs.
  • Scenario: Your friend constantly calls you up asking for rides, help with errands, or to borrow money. They never offer to return the favor and get upset if you hesitate to help.
• The Blame Game Champion: Taking responsibility for mistakes is nonexistent. They deflect blame, twist situations, and make you question your own memory.
  • Scenario: You and your friend accidentally damage someone's property while playing basketball. When confronted, your friend denies any wrongdoing and insists it was entirely your fault. They pressure you to apologize and take the fall for them.
• The Competitive Chameleon: They envy your successes and subtly compete with you. Your achievements may be downplayed or met with passive-aggressive remarks.
  • Scenario: You get accepted into your dream graduate program. Your friend congratulates you, but then mentions how they almost applied to the same program but decided it "wasn't the right fit for them." They spend the rest of the evening talking about their own career goals, making yours seem less impressive or unimportant.

Workplace

• The Glory Thief: They readily take credit for the work of others. They may downplay the contributions of colleagues or completely omit their involvement in a project's success.
  • Scenario: You and a coworker collaborate on a successful presentation. During the meeting, your narcissistic colleague takes sole credit for the entire project, failing to mention your contributions. Despite your discomfort, they bask in the praise from the boss.
• The Blame Juggler: Shifting blame becomes an art form. When projects fail to meet expectations, they deflect responsibility, pointing fingers at colleagues and downplaying their own role in the mistakes.
  • Scenario: Your team misses a crucial deadline on a project. The narcissistic team leader blames everyone else for delays, criticizing your work ethic and time management skills. They refuse to acknowledge their own poor communication and unrealistic expectations.
• The Boastful Broadcaster: They constantly brag about their accomplishments, no matter how insignificant. They dominate meetings with self-promotion and expect constant praise for their work.
  • Scenario: During a routine staff meeting, a colleague spends most of their time talking about awards they've won, projects they've completed, and skills they possess. They interrupt others and seem uninterested in anyone else's contributions.
• The Lone Wolf: Collaboration is a foreign concept. They struggle to work effectively as part of a team, preferring to do things their way and receiving sole credit.
  • Scenario: You're assigned to a group project with a narcissistic colleague. They refuse to listen to your ideas, dismiss your suggestions, and insist on doing most of the work themself (their way).
• The Privileged One: They believe they deserve special treatment and constantly seek advantages over colleagues. They may expect preferential treatment, longer breaks, or better assignments.
  • Scenario: A colleague consistently arrives late to work and expects no repercussions. They also demand to be assigned the most prestigious projects while leaving the less desirable tasks for others. They become upset if their requests are not readily met.

Family Dynamics

• The Guilt Trip King/Queen: These parents manipulate their children with emotional ploys to gain attention or control. They may make their children feel responsible for their happiness or guilt them into doing things their way.
  • Scenario: Every time you make plans with friends, your parent becomes overly dramatic and guilt-trips you about abandoning them. They make comments about how lonely they are or how much they need your help, making you feel obligated to cancel your plans.
• The Competitive Siblings: Love and support are replaced by constant competition for parental attention and validation. Achievements are belittled, and one-upmanship becomes the norm.
  • Scenario: You get straight A's on your report card and excitedly share the news with your sibling. Instead of celebrating your success, they point out how they got even higher marks last semester, diminishing your accomplishment.
• The Praise Vacuum: These children have an insatiable need for admiration and constant validation. They may throw tantrums or manipulate situations to get the attention they crave.
  • Scenario: Your child participates in a school play. Afterward, you express how proud you are of their performance. However, they become upset because you didn't mention a specific line they delivered perfectly. They pout and demand more praise to feel satisfied.
• The Dismissive Critic: These family members belittle or criticize the achievements and choices of others. They may use sarcasm or put-downs to make others feel inferior.
  • Scenario: You land a new job you're excited about. When you share the news with a narcissistic family member, they make a snide remark about the company or the position, implying it's not good enough.
• The Love Void: While they may express affection superficially, genuine emotional connection is lacking. They may struggle to show empathy, offer support, or celebrate the successes of others.
  • Scenario: You're going through a difficult time and reach out to a narcissistic family member for comfort. They offer impersonal advice or quickly change the subject to talk about themselves. You leave the conversation feeling unheard and unsupported.

The Impact of Narcissistic Behavior

Living with or being close to someone who exhibits narcissistic behavior can take a significant toll on your emotional well-being. Here's why:

• Constant Need for Validation: The narcissist's insatiable need for admiration can leave you feeling like your self-worth is constantly on trial. Their lack of genuine reciprocity and focus on themselves can breed insecurity and self-doubt.
• Walking on Eggshells: The narcissist's unpredictable behavior and potential for outbursts can create a tense and anxious environment. You may find yourself constantly worried about saying or doing the wrong thing, leading to emotional exhaustion.
• Emotional Manipulation: Narcissists are masters of emotional manipulation. They may use guilt trips, blame-shifting, or even threats to control your behavior and get what they want. This can leave you feeling confused, hurt, and questioning your own reality.
• Diminished Self-Esteem: The narcissist's constant criticism, belittling remarks, and tendency to downplay your accomplishments can chip away at your self-esteem. Over time, you may start to internalize their negativity and doubt your own abilities.
• Isolation and Loneliness: The narcissist's need for control and their tendency to create conflict can damage your relationships with others. You may find yourself withdrawing from friends and family to avoid drama or protect them from the narcissist's negativity. This isolation can further exacerbate feelings of loneliness and emotional vulnerability.

Understanding Narcissistic Behavior

While narcissistic behavior can be damaging, it's important to understand that it may stem from underlying issues. Here are some potential contributing factors:

• Fragile Self-Esteem: Despite their outward arrogance, narcissists may have a fragile sense of self-worth. Their constant need for admiration and validation may be a way to compensate for deep-seated insecurity.
• History of Abuse or Neglect: Childhood abuse, neglect, or a lack of emotional validation can contribute to the development of narcissistic traits.
• Lack of Emotional Regulation: Narcissists may struggle to manage their emotions in a healthy way. They may use grandiosity, manipulation, or aggression to cope with feelings of vulnerability or shame.

It's important to remember that understanding the reasons behind narcissistic behavior doesn't excuse their actions. The impact on those around them is very real. If you find yourself in a relationship with someone who exhibits these behaviors, it's crucial to prioritize your own well-being and mental health.

Connect with a vetted therapist today.

Dealing with Narcissistic Behavior

Living with or interacting with a narcissist can be emotionally draining.  Here are some practical tips to help you navigate these situations and protect your well-being:

• Set Boundaries and Limitations: This is crucial. Clearly communicate what behaviors you will not tolerate and what kind of treatment you expect. Be prepared to enforce these boundaries, even if it means limiting contact with the narcissist.
• Don't Jolt with Their Jabs: Narcissists often use criticism and negativity to manipulate you. Learn to recognize their tactics and avoid taking their barbs personally. Detach emotionally and don't engage in heated arguments.
• Prioritize Your Own Well-Being: You cannot control the narcissist's behavior, but you can control how you respond to it.  Make self-care a priority. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Maintain healthy relationships with supportive friends and family.
• Seek Support: Dealing with a narcissist can be isolating. Don't hesitate to seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a therapist. Talking to someone who understands your situation can provide valuable guidance and emotional validation.

Connect with a vetted therapist today.

Final Thoughts

Recognizing narcissistic behavior is the first step towards protecting yourself from its negative impact. 

By understanding the common signs and how they manifest in different relationships, you can better equip yourself to navigate these situations. 

Remember, you don't have to tolerate unhealthy behavior. Prioritize your well-being, set boundaries, and seek support if necessary. There are healthy ways to cope with narcissism, and you deserve to have positive and supportive relationships in your life.