+

Finding a therapist is exhausting.

That's why we vet therapists for you.

Find a vetted therapist
April 1, 2024

Is My Friend a Narcissist Quiz

Kristie Plantinga
,
MA
a group of friends hangs out at a music festival; is my friend a narcissist quiz
Guides
April 1, 2024
5 min to read
Show table of contents

Friendships are meant to be sources of joy, support, and mutual understanding in our lives. However, when a friendship becomes lopsided, draining, or even toxic, it can take a significant toll on our mental and emotional well-being. 

If you find yourself constantly walking on eggshells around a friend, feeling belittled or invalidated, or doubting your own reality, you may be caught in the grip of narcissistic behavior. 

Recognizing these patterns in someone you once considered a close friend can be a painful experience, leaving you questioning the dynamics at play and uncertain about how to move forward. 

You're not alone in this struggle, and there's no shame in seeking guidance. This quiz is designed to help you gain clarity on the situation and determine if your friend's behavior aligns with common narcissistic traits. 

Remember, the goal is not to label or judge, but to understand, set appropriate boundaries, and prioritize your own well-being.

Disclaimer: While this quiz can help you identify some signs of narcissistic tendencies, it is important to remember that Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is typically diagnosed in adults. This is because children and teens are naturally more self-centered and their behavior can sometimes mimic narcissistic traits. As they mature, they typically develop empathy and social skills that differentiate them from adults with NPD.

How accurate is this quiz?

At Best Therapists, we believe that online mental health quizzes can be an excellent first step towards improving our mental health. Quizzes like this one can educate you and provide opportunities for self-reflection, but note that they are not a substitute for professional assessments and diagnoses.

Take our quiz below ↓

Your privacy is important to us, so all results are completely anonymous and no email is required.

Example narcissistic scenarios

Friendships are about mutual support and respect. However, sometimes friends might exhibit behaviors that are more self-serving and lack empathy. Here are some scenarios where a friend might be displaying narcissistic tendencies.

Scenario 1 The monologue master

  • Situation: You hang out with your friend, but the conversation feels one-sided. They dominate the discussion, talking about themselves and their interests most of the time. You rarely get a chance to talk about yourself.
  • Narcissistic trait: This showcases a lack of interest in your life and experiences, prioritizing their own narrative over building a reciprocal connection.

Scenario 2 → The green-eyed monster in disguise

  • Situation: You achieve a personal goal or receive good news. Your friend seems happy for you at first, but then subtly downplays your accomplishment or mentions a similar achievement of theirs that somehow seems "better."
  • Narcissistic trait: This demonstrates a lack of genuine support and a competitive nature that can't celebrate your success without feeling diminished.

Scenario 3 → The fair-weather friend

  • Situation: You're going through a tough time and need a friend's support. When you reach out, your friend becomes unavailable, avoids the topic, or even changes the subject to talk about themselves.
  • Narcissistic trait: This highlights a lack of empathy and a tendency to be present only when things are good for you. They prioritize situations where they can be the center of attention.

Scenario 4 → The mastermind of guilt trips

  • Situation: You make plans with your friend, but something unexpected comes up and you have to cancel. They guilt-trip you, making you feel terrible and obligated to constantly prioritize their needs and desires.
  • Narcissistic trait: This showcases a manipulative approach to maintaining the friendship, using emotional manipulation to control your actions.

Scenario 5 → The "Yes, but..." complimenter

  • Situation: You share something new you bought or achieve a small goal. Your friend offers a backhanded compliment, downplaying your achievement or adding a critical remark that leaves you feeling confused and unsure of their true feelings.
  • Narcissistic trait: This demonstrates a struggle to offer genuine positive reinforcement, always finding a way to maintain a sense of superiority or needing to diminish your joy.

Remember:  Friendships are complex, and occasional instances of these behaviors may not be a cause for concern. However, if these patterns become consistent and negatively impact the dynamic, it's important to communicate your needs or consider setting boundaries to maintain a healthy friendship.

Need more answers?

Frequently asked questions

Start Getting help from a vetted therapist

Recover from narcissistic friendships with a friendship.

Written by
Kristie Plantinga
,
MA

Kristie Plantinga is the founder of Best Therapists. Along with being on the client-side of therapy, Kristie has had the honor of working directly with therapists in her marketing agency for therapists, TherapieSEO. While working alongside therapists, she learned about the inequities in our mental health system that therapists face on a daily basis, and she wanted to do something about it. That’s why Best Therapists is a platform designed to benefit not only therapy-seekers, but therapy providers. Kristie has a Masters degree in Written Communication and a Bachelors degree in Psychology and Music.

Reviewed by
Katelyn McMahon
,
Registered Psychotherapist, VT #097.0134200

Katelyn is a therapist-turned-writer with a passion for mental health. She has a Master's degree in Social Work from the University of England and is a Registered Psychotherapist in the state of Vermont. Katelyn has professional experience in aging care, addiction treatment, integrated health care, and private practice settings. She also has lived experience being on the client side of therapy. Currently, Katelyn is a content writer who’s passionate about spreading mental health awareness and helping other therapists and therapy-seekers Do The Work.

Ready to start therapy?

Find a Best Therapists vetted therapist.

Find a therapist
Show sources and research articles