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Meet Deana Tolstunov—Therapist at Best Therapists

Deana Tolstunov, LMFTA

Washington, LMFTA #61556285

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About Deana | They/them

Deana specializes in supporting clients through identity development, gender and sexuality exploration, relationship transitions and discernment, trauma work, and deepening intimacy, desire, and sex, while addressing the shame and stigma often surrounding such topics. They received their Masters in Couple and Family Therapy and a Sex Therapy Certificate from Antioch University Seattle. Their training in the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy makes them a great fit for highly motivated couples, diverse relationship dynamics, and individuals ready to get their hands dirty. Deana offers an authentic, nonjudgmental, compassionate, direct, and resourceful presence. Their approach is person-centered, curious, and collaborative, with room for laughter and silliness when it feels right. This work can look like helping clients get to the heart of an issue, assigning homework, and challenging negative beliefs. Deana provides trauma-informed and culturally empathetic therapy with a foundation rooted in HAES (Health at Every Size) principles, sex worker alignment, and advocacy for BIPOC and erotically marginalized populations, including the LGBTQ+, kink, and polyamorous communities. As a white, Jewish, queer, non-binary femme and the child of immigrants, Deana understands the importance of cultural identity. They specialize in helping clients explore the intersections of their identities.

Message to clients

Do you feel like you’ve lost your spark with a partner? Have you been feeling emotionally or sexually disconnected from yourself or a partner? Does sex ever feel uncomfortable and painful? Do you struggle with arousal and desire fluctuations? Are you feeling nervous about sharing certain sexual desires or kinks with a partner or coming to terms with them yourself? Do you hold fears or shame that prevent you from having the kind of sex you want to have? These are all concerns I have helped clients navigate. My passion for learning, connecting with people, and getting to the root of things led me from teaching sex education to practicing sex therapy, where deeper exploration is central. If any of the questions above resonate with you, I encourage you to reach out.

Education

Masters of Couple and Family Therapy | Antioch University Seattle, 2024

Race and ethnicity

White, Jewish

Cultural and experiential knowledge

White culture, Jewish culture, European culture

Languages spoken

English

Spiritual knowledge

Judaism, Wiccan/Paganism, Non-religious (Agnosticism, Atheism, Secular)

None listed

Nothing to see here :)

Virtual or in person

Virtual Only

Specialties

Polyamorous/non-monogamous couples counseling, Sex therapy, LGBTQ+ sexuality

Additional areas of focus

First generation immigrant experience, Gender identity, Transgender people, Trauma, Stress, Self esteem/self worth, Second or third generation immigration experience, Racial/cultural identity, Polyamory/non-monogamy/open relationships, Life transitions, Intercultural/interfaith relationships, Infidelity/affairs, Grief and/or loss, Depression, Dating, Couples counseling, Burnout, Body image, Anxiety, ADHD

Therapeutic style

Direct, Passionate, Inquisitive, Affirming, Holistic

Modalities

Emotionally focused therapy (EFT), Attachment based, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Family systems, Gottman method, Internal family systems (IFS), Narrative, Psychoanalytic, Psychodynamic, Solution-focused brief therapy, Somatic therapy, Strength-based therapy, Trauma-focused

Nothing to see here :)

Cost

$185

/

Individual Session

$195

/

Couples Session

$195

/

Family Session

Sliding scale

Offers sliding scale spots

Insurance accepted
Does not work directly with insurance companies
Works with your out of network benefits to get you reimbursed for therapy
Click here to check your benefits with our free out of network benefits checker
Peer review

If clients want someone who is compassionate, strategic, and well-informed in the multiple forces and influences at play in our mental health and relationships, this is the therapist for you. Deana is exceptional at meeting clients where they are at while holding them accountable to the goals they aspire to achieve.

—Melina Tovar, LMFTA
Peer review

Deana used to be a sex educator and is now a sex therapist making them uniquely attentive to their clients growing to be more differentiated people within a strong relationship. Deana has an abundance of care and empathy for their clients while still being direct enough to make progress happen.

—Siri Gerrity, LMFTA
Peer review

Deana is a fantastic therapist for clients new to therapy, as well as those who have had therapy in the past. They will meet you where you are at, but come along side you to challenge you and help assist you to get what you need out of therapy.

—Haley Krenzke, MS, LMFT, CST
Online reviews

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